This work of fiction is the only thing I can contribute to ATT or W40k at them moment, and thankfully I have plenty of time to write. I know I may be notorious to some for not finishing stuff, so instead I am going to wait to submit this until its lengthy enough to be enjoyed as a stand alone series of chapters. With that said, I do plan on adding new posts with further continuation every now and then. I'm attempting to put this on the highest level writing I can accomplish, and by the time anyone sees it I'll have been working on it a while to ensure its the most enjoyable thing that I have ever submitted to ATT.


Background: Odaris, a fringe planet on the Haarem System, has been annexed by the Tau Empire. Offered trade, resources and technology by the Tau Emissary, the local Imperial Magnate and Governor were quick to accept. Much of the planet quickly adapted to their new alien allies, but some pockets of local opposition still existed. Much to the dismay of the Shas commanders, only a month had passed before the resistance was able to send out a telepathic distress call. For months the planet rushed to prepare for battle, but nothing came. Then, after nearly a year of peace, the Imperium arrived. Thirteen Imperial warships and four behemoth infantry landers warped in system nearly on top of the Tau fleet. Despite the Tau possessing the superior numbers in system, nearly 20 warships and a dozen supporting mantas, the Imperial fleet quickly won the advantage. Eight of the Tau warships were orbiting on the far side of the planet, and nine of the Mantas were groundside. The Imperial broadside and more resilient ships tore apart eleven of the warships and all Mantas were lost.

The Imperial warmachine was quick to land on Odaris, disgourging hundreds of thousands of troops. Tau forces rallied all around the planet, calling in dozens of cadres from nearby systems. Among those to answer the call was Epsilon, a forward operating dark ops cadre. While thousands of Tau would live and die forging legends of heroism and skill on Odaris, it is perhaps Epsilon who will perform the most important tasks. Unfortunately, they will live and die in the shadow, and few will ever know their feats.


Blood on the Sand

"The Package"
132 days into the Odaris Campaign
Rith city, Odaris plateau
Operation Nights Dawn

Plasma arced across the darkened sky, answered by the brutish thump of more ballistic artillery across the battlefield. Shas'Ui Ves'er took another deep breath, motioned to his three remaining squad members and gripped his carbine a little tighter. A moment later his boot crashed through the wooden door, carbine raised as comm chatter tore through his headset, teams all over the city calling for fire support here or evac there. Ves'er felt a hand on his shoulder as he passed through the doorway, the reassuring hand of his battle-brother Kip'yasa as they simultaneously cleared both vectors of the room. Three green green lights popped up on his HUD, signaling that his other two members had also cleared the second entrance and were secure. Ves'er strobed his marker light for a half second at the nearest interior door, what appeared to be a nutritional intake space, while he wheeled to position his back to the wall, carbine covering both the now busted door as well the staircase across from him. Kip'yasa put his back to the wall adjacent to the door, clipped a photon grenade and tossed it with his closest hand into the room. A number of frantic cries emanated from the room, followed by a short burst of several gue'la rifles. Kip'yasa pivoted into the room, carbine shouldered, and fired three steady single shots. Kip walked slowly back into the main room, weapon in one hand at his side, head tilted. Ves'er shivered as the cold, wordless response flickered on his HUD: a single green light from Kip.

A moment later two yellow lights flashed, and Ves'er responded with his own green light, and the two changed to green. His two remaining team members, Vash'ta and Kall'yn entered through the now clear dining room. Ves'er nodded to acknowledge them, then motioned forward towards the staircase. Kall'yn took point, aimed his carbine forward and cleared the top of the stairs before ascending, followed closely by Kip. Ves'er moved along the wall, covering the entrances before climbing the stairs, facing down towards the entrance. Kall and Vash motioned green lights, then split in each direction at the top of the stairs, the hall forming a T with the staircase. Ves'er motioned downwards to Kip, who promptly spun around and covered the bottom of the stairs with his weapon. Ves'er moved right with Kall, the hall sparse and lit by only a single flickering light that fluttered out every few seconds as ordinance shook the entire city. As he rounded the hall Kall stood in an ill lit, shattered room, its roof and a section of wall completely ripped off.

"We missed it, Shas'Ui. Again. They've already moved the package, no doubt even before we assaulted his damnable city."

Ves'er couldn't help but sigh, his mike silenced. He then keyed up, "Vash, call for an Orca to move kill-team Epsilon out of the hot zone. I'll relay with our XV teams and have them meet us back at Primary Square for pick up."

Ves'er moved closer to Kall, placing a firm hand on his shoulder. His helmet clicked and whirled, then folded back into a collar. Off the mikes and privately he spoke.

"Do not despair, Kall. We are not finished. We will not stop fighting. We will find her."

-End of Chapter One-
-Begin transmit of Second Chapter-

6 Days after Operation Nights Dawn
Epsilon Fire Base

The return journey had been silent, even for Epsilon. Several teams had sustained injuries, and at least two firewarriors hadn't made it back to the Orca's alive. Once back at their FOB(forward operating base) Ves'er had spent countless hours over several days preparing for new personnel aquisitions, ammo and weapon shipments and other details. Such was the duty of a Shas'Ui, but he longed to sit with his team, to comfort their worries and stress, and most of all to look Kall in the eyes and tell him all would be well.

Night had come quickly, and Ves'er noticed his stomach was rumbling. He rubbed his eyes, pushed his latest stack of papers aside and stood up from his desk. It was a quick walk to the relaxation bays, where he could get some food, pec cafe and perhaps watch a fight vid with his team. He entered the bay, ordered a plate of sushi and shrimp tails, a cup of pec and then walked to the dining area. Surprised, he spotted both Kall, across the room on a couch, and Vash playing some arcade game farther down.

Kall hadn't been the same for several days, and Ves'er couldn't help but stare helplessly at him as he sat watching the report drone, almost lifeless and without expression. Then Vash punched him in the arm and slapped him in the head as he walked by, prompting Ves'er to snap back into reality and spring from his chair.

"Ooooo come on now 'Ui. Can't keep staring at your boyfriend forever now, can you?' Vash had his hands up, playfully jabbing as if in some boxing match. 'Now come at me mate, and we'll see if you still have what it takes to put me down, eh?"

Vash wasn't the largest of the team, but he certainly was the most agile, and Ves'er had always enjoyed brawling with the young 'la. The challenge seperated him from his concerns, and for a few minutes, the two traded a number of light blows before grappling to the ground. Ves'er was smaller than Vash but older and stronger, and despite the younger tau's stamina, Ves'er soon had him pinned in a very awkward, uncomfortable position. Sweat dripped from his brow as he released his squadmate, but to his dismay he popped up, not even out of breath, "Two out of three then?"

Ves'er waived the boy off, returning to his chair to finish his shrimp tails, trying to avoid watching Kall again. A minute later a larger shas entered the chamber, Shas'Ui'a Garr'an. Garr was one of the two XV-8 pilots attached to their kill-team, a loner by any standard. He was a miracle on the battlefield, unerring and quick to respond, but otherwise he no longer contained any semblance of social ability. He never spoke, and very rarely was seen away from his suit or in quarters. Ves'er longed to reach out to him, for the old warrior carried such a heavy weight of sadness that it almost smothered those in the room.

Kill-Team Epsilon had suffered their losses in the past, but had recently been re-augmented back to full operational strength. Comprising 6 4-5 man kill squads, 2 XV-8 units and 2 3 man XV-15 stealth squads, Epsilon was one of the Empires most advanced micro unit. They were dark ops to the core, and each man had access to equipment that the rest of the Shas wouldnt see for nearly five years. Repeating carbines, prototype battlesuits, nano-mesh armor, advanced body armor, micro personal active stealth fields. The Aun Council, at the behest of the leading Shas commanders, had authorized their creation, and for three years they had operated at the pinnacle of the war effort, doing things that the Empire could never allow as public knowledge using weapons the Empire could only dream of arming every Shas with.

Epsilon was the spear of the Empire, but as every soldier through time has feared, one day every spear shatters...

-End of Chapter Two-

*Feedback greatly appreciated!*

-Begin transmit of Third Chapter-

Epsilon Fire Base
8 days after Operation Nights Dawn

...will press on, Kall. You have to keep giving me all you've got. It's the only way I can continue to put this team in danger for you. It's the only way I can trust you in the field."

Shas'Ui Ves'er couldn't help but empathize with Kall's plight, as unorthodox as it may be. A single female ethereal, Aun'Ui Je'shala had been attached to oversee the workings of Epsilon. As Kall was the mission coordinating officer, he and the ethereal had spent a large amount of time together, planning assignments and requisitioning the needed equipment.

Ves'er knew that while the heavily structured social parameters of Tau culture forbade such inter caste intimate relations, and that Shas in particular had very few actual "relationships", things were different out in war. Especially in Cadres operating individually, and in their extreme case of having even less members, people tended to reach out for companionship wherever possible, even if it may later be forbidden or lead to punishment. Staying alive meant having something to anchor yourself too and more often than not, someone to really fight for.

Kall and Je's relationship had started innocently enough, but then quickly escalated into something more heated. Though they had remained discreet enough with their affections, little of personal details could be hidden from a cadre of Epsilons size. Over the course of a year, Kall and Je were able to openly reveal their feelings to the team, though Ves'er and other team leaders made it clear they would only support it if both of them did not allow their relationship to interfere with the mission. Astoundingly, not only did they comply, but their closeness and dedication to each other allowed them to perform with increased aptitude. Kall had something to truly fight for, and Je was determined to keep the team well supplied and thus, alive.

Everything went well for the next year and a half, but then things fell apart quickly. Je had accompanied the team into the field to investigate rumours of an alien power source being used by the gue'la on planet Mironas, the current operating field for Epsilon. Ves'er had been panicked to learn it was a trap, and nearly a third of their cadre had been killed, as well as two whole Strike Cadres who had been acting in tandem with Epsilon. The final blow to the mission was that Aun'Ui Je'shala had been captured, and despite Epsilons constant vigor to recapture her, the gue'la seemed always to be one step ahead. Kall had been stalwart in bearing the situation, but recently Ves'er could tell his hope was waning. Je had to be found, and she had to be found soon.

Ves'er stopped at the doorway before leaving Kall's quarters for a few moments, feeling the eyes of the young tau on his back.

"Do you love her, Kall?"

Silence persisted for a few moments, and then Kall replied with the most sincere, passionate voice Ves'er had heard from him in years.

"More than you could ever know, Ves'er brother. I would tear apart the Empire of Man to find her, the sun in every galaxy to hold her, the very crust of this world to look at her once more. She is my core, brother, my life. I will not fail you in the field, but please, we must find her soon."

Ves'er nodded in agreement and slowly walked from the room. His feeling of dread returned, his fear that despite every precaution, Kall's plight would be their own soon enough. The pressure was being applied...

...and the spear was finally beginning to shatter.

Hmmmm, no feedback at all. Maybe I've lost my writers touch.

-Begin Transmit of Chapter Four-

"Night of Broken Swords"

11 days after Operation Nights Dawn
Tristren City, Odaris Plateau

To say the call had come late in the night would be a severe understatement, and Ves'er was still trying to rub his eyes clear, slapping his own cheek to wake himself up. The Orca pilot was clearly fatigued as well, constantly making slight corrections every few seconds and occasionally bouncing the entire crew out of their seats.

Stealth Team Delta had made contact with Epsilon sentries only twenty two minutes earlier, a series of distressed red light comm updates followed by a short hand pair of coordinates only a few miles away. An alarm had sounded in the base four seconds later, and less than two minutes after that all of Epsilon was rushing from quarters to transports. Comm officers relayed exact orders and intel out to departing squads as their Orcas took off or in mid flight. For many cadres such chaos might overwhelm, but for Epsilon, it was simply another day on the job.

They had been in the air at least ten minutes, and the pilot had been rather "bumpy" for the last four. Ves'er had only just found a free moment to check the two point harness on his carbine and give it a single slap when the red klaxon started to strobe, a muffled and indiscernable statement flowed from the cockpit and then the bottom of the Orca dropped out, unceremoniously flinging them and pieces of unsecured equipment into the air amidst bursting flack and tracer rounds. As he plummeted to the ground with his face to the sky, a stray round glanced the Orca, bouncing it sideways into another round, exploding. Ves'er took a deep breath, re-steadied himself, and returned his his current plight: the ground rushing towards him.

Despite their equipment, being dropped out of a transport moving at nearly 200 clicks was always a bit disorienting. Ves'er spun around as trained, his eyes watching the horizon rather than the ground as his HUD monitored actual distance from the dirt. A few seconds into it a red light flashed, Ves'er thumbed the trigger and his stomach jumped into his throat as his personal "AJAH", or Aerial Jump/Assault Harness" activated and began to strobe. Seconds later he touched down on the roof of a human building, crouched to take cover and began to scan around for his team mates.

It wasn't after his disorientation passed after a few moments that he realized they had touched down in the midst of a violent firefight. Clearly Stealth Team Delta had been in such trouble that they relayed their distress call to every nearby cadre, as Ves'er could count armored units from at least six other units. Three combined lines of Hammerheads sat at the edge of the city on a high point, railguns pouring into the city in great white streaks of light. From closer to the city streams of Ion arced into the city, and the sheer amount of pulse round reports and plasma streaks meant their had to be hundreds of Fire Warriors and dozens of XV suits in the heart of the city. Across from them fought at least two gue'la armored regiments, hundreds of tanks and transports streaming into the city followed by seemingly thousands of infantry. From Ves'ers' high point he could count at least three of their monstrous war machines, called "Baneblades" or the like, rolling toward the front of the city. This wasn't so much a rescue mission anymore but a desperate gamble by both sides. Whoever won this battle would have the strength to force the other off the planet.

Ves'er noted that Orcas were now streaming into the edge of the city, unloading troops and resources. No doubt the fleets pair of in atmosphere Mantas were en route as well. Ves'er suddenly received three green lights on his HUD, turned around and noted his three team mates alighting on the roof he was perched, micro jump jets lofting them gently into the air from below.

"Good to have you back with me, brothers. Vash, we need to coordinate with the commanders on the ground and let them know that Epsilon has touched down in this quadrant. We don't need stray ordinance falling on us from here."

"Copy, Shas'Ui."

"This is still a priority one rescue mission. We have to get in there and secure Delta before any other considerations are taken. The zone is too hot to be moving four at a time, so we'll split into two fire teams. Kall, stick with Vash till he's linked up with the other Cadres, Kip and I will move out immediately. Stick to the roofs and try to coordinate with any nearby XV teams for fire support. Once Delta has been pulled out, link up and regroup here. We have two missions to accomplish here, and I have a feeling its going to be a long night, men."

Ves'er stood at the edge of the roof for another second, staring at the chaotic battlefield below. He took a single deep breath, steadied himself, and then without flinching, leapt off the building.

-End Chapter Four-

Overall it seems quite good to me, though I am by no means an expert. My only criticisms are that between chapters, the story doesn't really flow. There is no sense of direction to it. I also feel there should be a bit more background to it because "this" battle decides the fate of the planet but only has a few sentences on it in what to me, seems a rather disjointed story. Also at the beginning of chapter four when he is dropped from the orca, no time at all seems to have elapsed from mobilizing to actually making the jump. I suggest putting a little more description into the surroundings or start off with something like "The steady throb of the orca's engines filled his ears as he prepared to jump". It really needs something to set the scene. Hope this helps

It flows pretty well, though I'll agree somewhat with space pope that there's something missing between chapters. I believe it simply needs more set-up, so that the transition is explained. For example, between chapters 1 and 2: Is Ves'er in transit to the next mission and sparring in the cargo hold? Is he planetside somewhere? A little explanation (show don't tell!) would go a long way.

Like a lot of writers, I think your work would benefit from some ruthless self-editing. There are some sentences that I think would be punchier if they were slightly more concise. This goes especially for the combat sequences, which are otherwise very nicely written. I look forward to more.

Thanks for the replies! I've gone back and fixed some things. Most were fairly simple like you suggested, for example I added a short backstory at the beginning. Also, I was thinking about what you both said about the transitions, and I simply added a location and timeline from the opening chapter. I think it's simple enough to line up where they are in location and time.

I also fixed up specifically what pope and didi et gogo said with the sparring location and when they are dropped out of the Manta for clarification. Once again thanks for the comments and critiques, and if you happen to re read through it, let me know if i addressed your big issues well enough.